From Glock-N-Load, a.k.a. Donkey at theburningplatform.com:
I lifted this from a Yahoo commenter.
“The virus can travel 6 feet, however it cannot travel 6’1” or greater.
The virus can live on all surfaces except anything that comes in the mail from Amazon.
The virus does not exist in Target, Walmart, Home Depot, Lowes or in any grocery store.
The virus is only deadly in bars, restaurants, small businesses, hair salons and it is especially deadly in churches.
The virus cannot live on your food, as long as you only get take out.
The virus cannot survive in liquor stores or marijuana dispensaries
The virus can survive a day at the beach and thrives in large bodies of water.
The virus only comes out after 10 pm, so businesses must be closed by then.
The virus waits in the outside air and viciously attacks people walking down the street
The virus is far more deadly in Blue States, than Red States.
The virus only attacks people on a beach who bring a cooler or a sun umbrella.
The virus won’t affect politicians while they are standing at a podium.
The virus is highly contagious in shoes stores, but it is very safe in the shoe department at Walmart.
Politicians are far more susceptible to the virus while the cameras are on and not when they are off.
If you go to a beach, you can only get the virus while you are on dry sand, and not on wet sand.
While the virus kills people, the virus apparently is a partial cure for heart disease, stroke, cancer, diabetes, influenza and other respiratory issues, etc.
The virus is super deadly to those people who deny that the pandemic is real, but not deadly at all to major celebrities.
Wearing a mask will not protect you from the virus, then it will, then it won’t, then it will, then it will for adults – but not for children.
According to Dr. Fauci, the virus only became deadly in the United States after January 24, 2020. Before then, the virus was nothing to worry about.
At Walmart, the virus is not deadly on food, pharmacy items, automotive items, and shoes, but it was highly deadly on clothing, jewelry, camping supplies, gift cards, hobby items, sewing materials, batteries, and toys.
In California, The virus will kill anyone who would dare eat at a restaurant, unless you are the governor. In that case, you can eat wherever you want.
While you are safe from the virus in marijuana dispensaries, it is extremely deadly at gun stores.
This is a “novel” virus since we don’t know anything about it, yet we do know that it will have a second wave that will be far more deadly than the first wave, and that second wave will strike right before the presidential election.”