Diaper Report 7/25/20, by Eric Peters

The Boogie Man’s power lies in the fear of him, not his actuality.

Diaper Decrees operate on the same principle. If you don’t believe in them, their puissance disappears.

I just walked into the coffee shop I swing by almost every day – right past the Boogie Man sign insisting I put on a Diaper before I dare to. Unlike the Boogie Man – who didn’t get me – I got my cup of coffee.

And a cookie, too.

The same at my local Kroger – where, as I relayed in a previous Diaper Report, there is signage but nothing particularly puissant. If you’re willing to stand up to a sign, you can still shop at many of the stores that have “mandated” Diapering. Just walk in and do so, sans the Diaper.

But not everywhere.

A friend called to let me know about another store (the Roanoke co-op) that sicced a Diaperer on him.

The really sick thing about this is that the person who chased him around with a Diaper is someone my friend has known for years – like my dentist (now ex-dentist) knew me for years and knew I wasn’t sick – having taken my temperature and thus established objectively that I had no fever and so couldn’t get anyone sick, not being contagious – but excommunicated me nonetheless from his practice for refusing to don the Diaper.