From The Babylon Bee:
ATLANTA, GA—The CDC has issued a reminder that just because people get the vaccine, that doesn’t mean they should go outside, experience human interaction, or have any kind of joy or happiness in their lives ever again.
The newly revised guidelines indicate that people who have not yet been vaccinated should stay home, masked, in a bubble, forever. Those who have been vaccinated should do the exact same thing, except they are allowed to have a smug look on their faces for being vaccinated. Except you can’t see the smug look. Because of the mask.
What is the benefit of getting vaccinated, then? “Well, there are many benefits,” the CDC spokesperson said. “But the best benefit of all, of course, is that you’re on the right side of history. But still, stay in your home and be sad and depressed forever.”