Gun Stores See 7000% Increase In Customers Looking For Totally Awesome Gun That Blows The Lungs Out Of Bad Guys

From The Babylon Bee:

U.S.—Gun stores across America have seen a major increase in interest as customers flock to their stores to find the “totally awesome gun that blows the lungs out of bad guys.” The gun, which doesn’t exist, has inadvertently boosted the sale of 9mm handguns.

“Biden has been great for business,” said Anthony Darabont, manager of Bullets For Hire in Riverside, CA. “I printed out his dumb quote on a poster and hung it around the shop. Now the guns sell themselves!”

Experts suggest the huge increase in gun sales is expected to die down soon after people realize they aren’t able to blow lungs out of anything.

“We did have someone here last week who shot someone in self-defense. The gun probably saved his life but he would not stop complaining that the robber’s lungs weren’t flopping around all over the place like dead fish,” Darabont added. “So I said to her: ‘Lady, you can call the president. Maybe he’ll give you a refund.’ and then I said L-O-L because that’s how I do.”

Left-leaning politicians have sounded the alarm over increased gun interest among the citizenry. “Guns are very dangerous!” screeched Elizabeth Warren. “That’s why I’m calling for an immediate 2nd amendment committee to see how we can get around this pesky human right to defense and abolish all legal guns.”

Following her comments, gun sales surged yet again across the board. The NRA then formally thanked Warren for increasing gun sales around the country.


https://babylonbee.com/news/gun-stores-see-7000-increase-in-customers-looking-for-totally-awesome-gun-that-blows-the-lungs-out-of-bad-guys

2 responses to “Gun Stores See 7000% Increase In Customers Looking For Totally Awesome Gun That Blows The Lungs Out Of Bad Guys

  1. In other news, “police” in Uvalde, Texas, are being encouraged to turn in their guns because they don’t seem to know what they’re for, and their uniforms because they’re a disgrace to them. Uniforms still reeking of piss will not be accepted until cleaned.

    Like

  2. This from the same child sniffing, depends ropey dopey political Kabuki Theater meat puppet that said in public to “buy a double barrel shotgun” and if possibly threatened by an unknown source, “fire two shots through the kitchen door”.

    Here’s the video from the ‘Waaayback machine’ (2013):

    Joe Biden ‘Double Barrel Shotgun’ comments draw buzz
    while answering questions on gun control – YT

    As we can see, the parasite classes’ meat puppet has been
    doubling down on stupid+alzheimers ever since….

    Way to go ‘bwwuuuckshot bwwiiiden’…you’ll get that pwesssky
    waaabit someday!!….you’re the quintessential living meme for
    ‘Fudd’s’ everywhere.

    NorthGunner – The Truth Is It’s OWN Defense!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.