Tag Archives: Gas Prices

Biden Administration To Provide Grief Counselors At All Gas Pumps

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a move to help alleviate pain at the pump, the Biden Administration has announced a $1 billion initiative to provide grief and trauma counselors to stand by at all gas pumps across the nation.

The plan will fund licensed therapists and psychiatrists to stand at the ready at gas pumps from New York to California to comfort people mourning the loss of hundreds of dollars every time they fill up their tanks.

“There, there. It’s gonna be OK,” said one grief counselor as a woman filled up her VW at a gas pump in California. “Times like these can be difficult to cope with, but we can survive Putin’s Price Hike if we look deep within ourselves for strength and guidance. Now, let’s try some breathing exercises.”

Another woman in Ohio burst into tears after paying over $3 for gas for the first time in her life.

“Shhh, shhh, it’s OK, honey,” said one therapist, stroking her hair. “You’re going through the stages of grief. Soon, you’ll learn to live with $10 gas. You literally won’t even remember when gas was as cheap as it was during the Trump administration.”

“I know, I know,” the woman replied. “It’s just so hard to accept. I miss… I miss Trump.”

Biden has actually gotten pretty hands-on during this initiative, reporting that he plans to comfort young women at gas pumps himself from time to time “to help chip in.” “It’s the least I can do,” he said before stationing himself at a gas pump and waiting for a cute young girl to pull up.


White House Attempts To Distract From High Gas Prices By Putting Up Wacky Inflatable Tube Men In Front Of Price Signs

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—The White House has unveiled a new plan to deal with rising gas costs by installing a wacky inflatable tube man in front of every price sign across the country.

“Wow, look how much fun it is to go to the gas station now!” said Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg. “These wacky guys are going to turn frowns upside-down at pumps everywhere. Sure is hard to be depressed about canceling your family vacation when those arms are flailing in the wind!”

As gas prices continue to set records across America, the White House has been desperately brainstorming ways to not help and instead divert people’s attention. “The problem is not our policies, the problem is that the media has done a terrible job communicating how great we are,” said Press Secretary Karine Jeanne-Pierre. “We are doing incredible at forcing poor people to stop driving and using air conditioning, thus reducing our use of fossil fuels. But, short-sighted whiners that the poors are, they simply do not appreciate our help.”

After gas surged past five dollars per gallon, the decision was made to deploy the wacky, waving, inflatable arm-flailing tube men. “No way we are letting the fact people can’t afford to live steal our January 6th thunder!” said Representative Eric Swalwell, swinging his nunchucks. “Soon as we re-hash the riot we have been ramming down everyone’s throats for the last 18 months, America will love us again. You’ll see!”

At publishing time, Biden had come to blows with one of the inflatable tube men for failing to stay standing in the presence of the President. The tube man reportedly won the brawl handily.


Biden Says Gas Prices Are Not His Fault Unless They Go Back Down Again

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C—Joe Biden held a press conference to address criticisms head-on claiming he is responsible for America’s higher gas prices. The President strongly refuted such claims, stating that he’s not responsible—unless of course, the prices go way down.

“It’s simply not true. It just isn’t folks,” said Joe Biden defensively. “I have no control over gas prices whatsoever—unless, of course, they go way back down again. In that case, then it’s all me.”

“But for the time being, I can’t do much right now. Russia is responsible,” the President added. “Should the prices go down again, when Trump gets reelected for example, then that is my fault. All my fault. Guilty as charged for all gas prices.” Biden then seemed to forget what he was talking about and stared blankly into the camera for 5 straight minutes.

Conservative critics have pointed out that there are several actions the President could take right now—such as allowing more offshore drilling, removing restrictions, and promoting pipeline projects. But Jen Psaki has already debunked them explaining that even if they did all that, greedy gas companies would just keep setting the prices high.

At publishing time, the Biden administration proudly took credit for a 2 cent price decrease only for gas price to double to a new all-time high the next day.


Skyrocketing fuel costs will lead to a winter of discontent, by James Bovard

One year ago, President-elect Joe Biden warned that Americans would have a “very dark winter” because of COVID. Now that he is president, Biden may give Americans a Valley Forge winter – a season that could be both brutally cold and bitterly expensive. That could produce a political disaster that surpasses all of Biden’s previous bungling.

At a CNN town hall in July, Biden declared, “The vast majority of the experts including Wall Street are suggesting that it’s highly unlikely that it’s going to be long term inflation is going to get out of hand.” After Wednesday’s federal report showing that consumer prices are rising more than 6 percent a year, the White House is changing its talking points. On Wednesday in Baltimore, Biden confided to an audience: “Did you ever think you’d be paying this much for a gallon of gas? In some parts of California they’re paying $4.50 a gallon.”

But Biden’s newfound sympathy for victims of high prices won’t warm any homes this winter.

Natural gas prices have jumped more than 180 percent since September 2020, and that will spur increases in electricity costs. Home heating oil prices have jumped 115 percent over the past year. Fuel oil is up almost 60 percent from a year ago. The federal government forecast last month that home heating costs could rise 54 percent this winter — but heating costs could actually triple, according to some private forecasts.

Biden promised to “do everything in our power to stabilize the supply chain,” one factor in the rising prices. But regardless of the promises by White House aides, Biden has no magic wand to fix the problem. Biden’s unemployment pandemic bonuses paid people not to work, spurring labor force disruptions across the nation.

Pervasive shortages of truck drivers and other occupations assure that the current problems will multiply. The federal Energy Information Administration warned last month that diesel stockpiles — used for home heating oil and other products — are at a 20-year low. “We potentially could see shortages in parts of the country unless the Biden administration treats this as the emergency that it is,” Fox News recently reported.

Biden administration officials are insisting that the surge of inflation is “transitory.” Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen promised last week, “I expect that next year, many of the supply bottlenecks that we’re experiencing now in opening up our economy will recede.”

But the Biden infrastructure bill that Congress just enacted is expected to worsen inflation for key supplies.

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Happy Days At The Gas Pump Are Over As Prices Soar, by Tyler Durden

Gas prices have been going up since Biden’s inauguration. From Tyler Durden at zerohedge.com:

When the virus pandemic first hit early last year, Americans were locked down in their homes as gasoline demand plunged and prices crashed. Last April, the nationwide average for gasoline was around $2. According to AAA, prices are surging nationwide, up 32 cents in the previous month to $2.796 for regular.

On Monday, regular gasoline in Los Angeles County rose for the 27th consecutive day and 47th time in 48 days, increasing to $3.81, the highest since Dec. 3, 2019. Average prices for crude products in the metro area have been on a tear, resulting in a price shock for many consumers who are still battling food and housing insecurities, along with job loss as they wait for the next round of stimulus checks.

AAA said average gasoline prices in Los Angeles had risen 46.5 cents in the past 48 days.

Happy times at the pump are over as crude product prices continue to rise. 

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The Cost of the (S)election . . . at Every Fill-Up, by Eric Peters

If you’re paying more for gas, and for many other things like food in which gas is part of the cost, thank Joe Biden. From Eric Peters at ericpetersautos.com:

Some probably think it was worth anything to get rid of the Orange Man – who got rid of himself, when you think about it, by not doing anything to prevent the spread of weaponized hypochondria.

But we’re finding out what it’s going to cost us.

Over just the past six weeks or so, the average price of a gallon of gasoline has risen from just over $2 a gallon to almost $3 per gallon. It is more than $3 per gallon in some areas – and is almost certain to get that high – and higher – everywhere else.

(S)elections have consequences.

The new el presidente – Third World jefe form, now appropriate in what was once the first world – sent us the bill almost as soon as he got (s)elected; it just took a few weeks for it to get to us.

He sent us the bill via decrees – these are styled “executive orders” to make them sound less like the decrees of an el presidente-jefe. They included the summary cancellation of the Keystone pipeline and the intimations of similar and more to come – all of them designed to make gasoline more expensive by making it more expensive to get the oil from which it is made.

To prevent as much oil from being produced here as was produced here prior to the selection. This axiomatically increases the scarcity of oil here and thus the price of gas everywhere.

It is very likely to get a great deal more expensive than it already is.

But let’s consider just how much it costs already – without considering how much it is likely to cost soon – and then you can decide whether the selection of the el presidente-jefe was worth it to you.

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Fake News? How About No News? by Eric Peters

You have to dig to find out about France’s Yellow Vest protests and the government’s response to it in this country. From Eric Peters at ericpetersautos.com:

Trump gets flak for characterizing the mainstream press as purveyors of Fake News. But what about no news at all?

Isn’t lack of coverage even worse than biased coverage?

Well, how much news have you heard or read about the gilets jaunes – or “yellow vest” – protests in France? CNN hasn’t got anything on its main page today (Jan. 9). Neither did NBC or CBS. Lots of the usual – endless – carpet-chewing coverage of Trump, though. And also of such important stories as “Want to Pay off Your Mortgage? Try Frugal Minimalism.”

You might think France, a major western European country, coming unglued – and on the verge of its government outright banning “unauthorized” criticism of its actions – might at least be  . . .  well,  news.

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