Tag Archives: Joe Biden

The Burden Of Proof Is Always On The Ones Making The Claim (Even If It’s About Russia), by Caitlin Johnstone

How long before asking government officials for proof of their assertions becomes a criminal offense? From Caitlin Johnstone at caitlinjohnstone.com:

Well you’ll be shocked to learn that, while the Ukraine invasion we’ve been told for weeks was happening any day now still has not occurred, the US and UK have declared that Russia attacked Ukraine in an invisible and unverifiable way for which the evidence is secret.

“The White House blamed Russia on Friday for this week’s cyberattacks targeting Ukraine’s defense ministry and major banks and warned of the potential for more significant disruptions in the days ahead,” AP reports. “Anne Neuberger, the Biden administration’s deputy national security adviser for cyber and emerging technologies, said the U.S. had rapidly linked Tuesday’s attacks to Russian military intelligence officers.”

“Technical information analysis shows the GRU was almost certainly involved in disruptive DDoS attacks,” adds a statement from the UK Foreign Office.

No evidence for this claim has been provided beyond the assertive tone with which American and British officials have uttered it, but that likely won’t stop arguments from western narrative managers that this “attack” justifies immediate economic sanctions.

https://twitter.com/kgosztola/status/1494797904556572675?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1494797904556572675%7Ctwgr%5E%7Ctwcon%5Es1_c10&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fcaitlinjohnstone.com%2F2022%2F02%2F19%2Fthe-burden-of-proof-is-always-on-the-ones-making-the-claim-even-if-its-about-russia%2F

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Clarence Thomas Surprised To Hear How Important Black Representation On SCOTUS Is To Man Who Viciously Tried To Destroy Him

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas was surprised to learn last week that black representation is very important to President Biden. This comes after Biden previously attempted to block Thomas’s nomination while viciously attempting to destroy his life and reputation.

“Black representation matters, folks!” said Biden to a group of journalists outside the White House. “I have always been extremely passionate about black people being judges on, um, courts and stuff. It’s all I’ve dreamt about since I was a young boy on the tough streets of Baltimore!”

When asked about how he felt about Clarance Thomas being on the court despite his best efforts, Biden replied: “Who?” before reaching down to sniff his pet cat which he had mistaken for a very small child.

Thomas, who had been smeared over sexual harassment claims that were never actually filed, was humiliated on live TV by Joe Biden who, at the time was a 49-year-old balding racist serving in the senate. Biden turned the confirmation hearing into a circus because he disagreed with Clarence Thomas’ views on a few things.

“I can’t rightfully vote for someone who thinks babies deserve to live,” said Biden at the time. “Plus, you’re a black! Whoever heard of such an outlandish idea as a black on the court! I vote nay!”

Biden reaffirmed his commitment to nominating a woman of color to the court yesterday, and promised to pick someone “clean and articulate.”

https://babylonbee.com/news/clarence-thomas-surprised-to-hear-how-important-black-representation-on-scotus-is-to-man-who-viciously-tried-to-destroy-him

Biden Promises To Replace Retiring Quarterback Tom Brady With A Woman Of Color

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Legendary quarterback Tom Brady has announced his plan to retire from the NFL to spend more time carving little wooden toys for his grandkids. In response to the earth-shattering news, President Joe Biden has announced his commitment to replace the outgoing football star with a woman of color.

“Listen, folks, it’s time,” said Biden to the press. “In the hundred-year history of the NFL, not a single quarterback has ever been a woman of color. That’s racist! We all know that poor women are just as smart and powerful as white kids. As president, I will nominate a new quarterback to replace Tom Brady that reflects America’s diversity.”

When told he doesn’t have the authority to nominate quarterbacks to the NFL, Biden told his staff he would just sign the executive order and let the courts deal with it later.

“There’s no excuse,” said Biden. When I used to play Nine Pins with Jehoshaphat Jenkins and the townsfolk, we always used to let the black women play with us. I was a civil rights hero, darn it! It’s time for the rest of the world to catch up!”

So far, candidates being considered for the empty position include Michelle Obama, Tyler Perry, and Colin Kaepernick in a woman’s wig.

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-promises-to-replace-retiring-quarterback-tom-brady-with-a-woman-of-color

Biden Considers Starting World War III To Distract From Domestic Failures

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Faced with plummeting poll numbers and the realization that a rambling, semi-coherent, two-hour press conference failed to turn things around, President Biden is apparently considering a new strategy to save his floundering presidency: start World War III.

Deploying troops, warships, and aircraft to confront Russia over Ukraine is the first step in the new plan to escalate a regional conflict into a global clash between superpowers. Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff General Milley said, “It’ll be great. Everyone likes a good war, right? Certainly everyone I know—all the generals and defense contractors and Washington elites—they all love a good war. It’s a win-win! Unless we lose. Don’t include that last part.”

“It’s a very sound political strategy,” an unnamed source within the administration told this reporter. “When the nukes start flying and half of Europe is in flames, who’s going to care anymore about a little inflation or a shortage of COVID tests? Plus we showed with Afghanistan that we have absolutely no idea how to end a war. I’m sure starting one has got to be way easier.”

Jen Psaki was quoted as saying, “Frankly, I’m so tired of answering questions about the failed immigration policy and the failed Build Back Better bill and the failed voting rights bill and the failed COVID policy and the failed economic policy and ‘didn’t the stock market collapse today?’—anyway, it’ll be nice to talk about a failed war for a change.”

Those willing to give their lives to defend Ukraine and boost Biden’s poll numbers can report to their nearest recruiting station.

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-considers-starting-world-war-iii-to-distract-from-domestic-failures

Joe Biden Beats Out Brussels Sprouts For America’s Least Favorite Vegetable

From The Babylon Bee:

U.S.—A new Gallup Poll shows President Biden beating out the infamous Brussels Sprout for America’s least favorite vegetable. The poll, partially conducted as a survey for TV’s Family Feud, has been criticized by the Biden administration as “unfair.”

Press Secretary Jen Psaki addressed the polling data during her daily press briefing. “The president feels, and we agree, that he’s not a vegetable because he occasionally moves around sometimes. A Brussel sprout or, excuse me, ‘Brussels sprout’ doesn’t move. It is literally a vegetable. The president also feels that he tastes much better.”

“Besides,” Psaki continued. “We believe that while the president may be a less favorable vegetable, his being a vegetable is a major boon for us as a nation. Vegetables make you strong like Wolverine or Colossus.”

The majority of the press in attendance appeared to be satisfied with the answer. Fox News Reporter Peter Doocy, however, pressed the issue. “But everyone hates Brussels sprouts!”

Psaki did not respond to Doocy’s statement, but President Biden did later call him a “stupid shepherd’s pie.”

At publishing time, Jen Psaki apologized for implying that people in a vegetative state are like the X-Men.

https://babylonbee.com/news/joe-biden-beats-out-brussel-sprouts-for-americas-least-favorite-vegetable

Putin’s Quid: No Offensive Missiles in ‘ABM’ Sites, by Ray McGovern

Negotiation and a settlement between the U.S. and Russia is not an impossibility. From Ray McGovern at antiwar.com:

Take heart, most of you who fear war rather than profit from it. You would not know it amid the gloom and doom about “another Russian invasion” of Ukraine, but diplomacy – not war – is about to break out this month.

As senior U.S. and Russian negotiators begin talks early next week in Geneva, the makings of a first-step-in-the-right-direction deal are already at hand. And for this we can thank Presidents Joe Biden and Vladimir Putin for serious, attentive, one-to-one conversations in the past several weeks.

You don’t need a degree in Kremlinology or tea leaves to understand how this came about and what led to the Biden-Putin talks: in one key respect the second (Dec. 7, virtual) was a carbon copy of the first (June 16 in Geneva).

Both came at Biden’s initiative, after Russia moved tens of thousands of troops near the border with Ukraine ready to stave off, or respond to, Ukrainian government threats to take back the Donbass and Crimea. By April 2021, things had come to a head, culminating in President Biden’s strange call to President Putin on April 13. (It is a safe guess that it was Putin who called first and left a “voicemail” saying: “Your unleashed Ukrainians and the American crazies abetting them are playing with fire; please call me – and quickly“).

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Good News For Dems: Biden And Harris Now Polling At 66% Approval If You Combine Their Numbers

From The Babylon Bee:

https://babylonbee.com/news/good-news-biden-and-harris-now-polling-at-66-approval-if-you-combine-their-numbers

Biden Defied the Military Establishment: Is the Kennedy-Nixon Rule Still in Effect? by Paul Ryder

Generally presidents realize who’s really running the country. Only a couple have fallen out of line and gotten their comeuppance. Will that be Biden’s fate? From Paul Ryder at counterpunch.org:

In a 2020 essay, “Removing a president without an election,” I described attempts to remove five presidents in the middle of a term: Franklin Roosevelt, John Kennedy, Richard Nixon, Bill Clinton, and Donald Trump.

Kennedy and Nixon, the two presidents whose terms were cut short, had made the mistake of defying the U.S. military establishment, on Cuba and Vietnam respectively. The other eleven modern presidents subordinated themselves and served their full terms in office unmolested. Even Trump, who hurled vulgar insults at the military, ended up doing what they wanted. Every time he signed an order that was out of line, they talked him out of it, delayed it, changed it, ignored it, or lied to him by saying they had carried it out.

At the core of the military establishment are the Pentagon, big tech firms and weapons manufacturers led by Lockheed Martin, Boeing, Northrup Grumman, Raytheon, and General Dynamics. Elsewhere in the government, it includes the Congress, Supreme Court, White House, Departments of Energy, State, Treasury, and Homeland Security, CIA, FBI, National Security Agency, and fifteen other intelligence agencies, AID, and the National Endowment for Democracy. Playing supporting roles are big media, foundations, think tanks, universities, consultants, Democratic and Republican parties, and private security services contractors.

During the 2020 election, the safe bet was that Joe Biden would join the ranks of obedient presidents. His voting record, platform, contributors, advisers, and staff all pointed to it. His foreign policy decisions as president have been largely consistent with this.

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“The Bidens”: Is the First Family Corrupt, or Merely Crazy? By Matt Taibbi

All of the above. From Matt Taibbi at taibbi.substack.com:

Politico reporter Ben Schreckinger’s new book is an equal opportunity offender that may push a reluctant national media to re-examine ugly questions about President Joe Biden

If you want insight into how challenging life has become for reporters in the Trump era, take a glance at the author’s note for The Bidens, the controversial new book about the president and his family by Politico reporter Ben Schreckinger.

No journalism is apolitical, but Schreckinger’s approach to investigating the first family is as close as you’ll find in the “moral clarity” era to old-school aspirations to objectivity. This book initially won love from the conservative press because Schreckinger brought the mainstream imprimatur of Politico to confirmation of some of the key emails in the infamous Hunter Biden laptop story. But that enthusiasm may have tailed off when reporters for those outlets read the book, which is also brutal in its treatment of figures like Rudy Giuliani, Lev Parnas, and Donald Trump; Schreckinger is an equal-opportunity offender.

In the author’s note, however, it’s clear Schreckinger is concerned about how the mere act of publishing damaging information about Joe Biden and his family members will be received. “We live in an age of distrust and of coordinated campaigns to manipulate public opinion,” he writes, adding: “Readers have every right to wonder whether an extended inquiry into the Biden family, emphasizing its finances, is just some instrument of a broader effort to create a political narrative.”

He goes on to reassure readers that that’s not what he’s up to, that he just believes “the best way to understand people in power, and subjects of international controversy, is to attempt a thorough, timely examination.” He then adds, in a note that reads like he’s saying, “You may be more receptive to these disquieting facts in a few years”:

Too often people interpret the news of the day through the lens of their own political sympathies, and a more nuanced understanding of our leaders emerges only much later, when political pressures have eased.

For these reasons, he has hope the reader can accept his “holistic” telling of the Bidens’ story, which turns out to be a far darker and freakier tale than conventional wisdom has yet conceded.

Schreckinger is young, and The Bidens was clearly written in a bit of a hurry, but he’s a skilled storyteller. The initial framing is clever, with a first first chapter titled, “Chekhov’s Laptop,” a reference to Russian playwright’s famous dictum that “if in the first act you have hung a pistol on the wall, then in the following one it should be fired.”

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Aides Quickly Drag President Away As He Tries To Join In ‘F*** Joe Biden’ Chant

From The Babylon Bee:

WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Biden took a much-needed break from his 4-hour workdays and late-night Matlock binges to attend the Congressional Baseball Game this past weekend, but things quickly went south when he attempted to join the crowd in a rowdy “F*** Joe Biden” chant.

“Yeah, that Biden guy is the worst!” said Biden. “F*** Joe Biden! F*** Joe Biden! Hehe, nothing like a rowdy chant at the old ball game, eh folks?”

Panicked aides quickly grabbed him by the arms and dragged him out of sight to administer some additional meds.

According to witnesses, Biden later returned to the game and looked out on the crowd with his classic medication-induced serene Biden smile.

The FBI has confirmed they will be dedicating 1,328 agents to investigate who started the insurrectionist chant so they can be arrested.


https://babylonbee.com/news/aides-quickly-drag-president-away-as-he-tries-to-join-in-f-joe-biden-chant