Tag Archives: CNN

Nuclear Launch Codes To Be Stored Securely On CNN+ Broadcast Where No One Will Ever See Them

From The Babylon Bee:

ATLANTA, GA—After spending $3.2 trillion taxpayer dollars in search of the most effective security system available, the U.S. government announced plans to store its nuclear launch codes by broadcasting them on CNN+ where no one will ever see them.

“Our research has confirmed CNN’s new subscription broadcast service is as impenetrable as a black hole tucked inside Fort Knox, blanketed by a large cloak of invisibility,” said U.S. Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin to journalists whose careers had not yet been ruined by gigs on CNN+. “As an example of its faultless security, renowned anchor Chris Wallace all but disappeared from existence after setting one foot inside.”

CNN’s Brian Stelter then asked the secretary who this “Chris Wallace” person was, to which Secretary Austin replied, “Who?”

Real journalists then questioned Secretary Austin on why they were urging CNN+ to remove password protection and make the content freely available to anyone, to which he responded with a giggle, “Why not? The codes will still be overwhelmingly safe from public view.”

At publishing time, the White House was making preparations to publish the nuclear launch codes on the CNN.com homepage, stating it will soon be the least visible location on the planet.

https://babylonbee.com/news/nuclear-launch-codes-to-be-stored-securely-on-cnn-broadcast-where-no-one-will-ever-see-them

Chris Wallace Expected To Double CNN’s Viewership To 4

From The Babylon Bee:

https://babylonbee.com/news/chris-wallace-expected-to-double-cnns-viewership-to-4

CNN Airs “Town Hall” With Sesame Street Puppets Encouraging Kids To Get Vaccinated, by Tyler Durden

If CNN personnel swapped jobs with the cast of Sesame Street, it would raise the average IQ of the former and lower that of the latter. From Tyler Durden at zerohedge.com:

CNN has stooped to a new low in the hysteria to try and get children vaccinated: it is using puppets from the popular kids show Sesame Street to promote the Covid-19 jabs.

CNN aired a program called ‘The ABCs of COVID Vaccines: A CNN/Sesame Street Townhall for Families’ this weekend where the puppets showed up to recommend to kids that they get vaccinated. The ‘town hall’ came just hours after the FDA approved the Pfizer vaccine for children aged 5 to 11.

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CNN Accidentally Allows Someone To Tell The Truth On Air, by Tyler Durden

According to the statistics, CNN’s viewership numbers are abysmally low. The alternative media gives the network far more attention than it deserves, and here’s SLL committing the same crime. However, truth out of CNN, regardless of source, is so rare that it deserves spotlighting. From Tyler Durden at zerohedge.com:

Less than a week after CNN scrambled to do damage control when their chief medical correspondent was wrecked by Joe Rogan over Ivermectin lies, the network may have another fire to put out…

Indeed, just days after anchor Don Lemon tried to ‘networksplain’ Rogan’s argument, host Brian Stelter made the mistake of allowing former NYT Editor Bari Weiss on air to discuss examples of why the world has gone mad.

Stelter’s first mistake, of course, was having Weiss on his show.

His second mistake was assuming she didn’t have receipts when she said the world has gone mad.

Where can I start? Well, when you have the chief reporter on the beat of COVID for The New York Times talking about how questioning or pursuing the question of the lab leak is racist, the world has gone mad.

When you’re not able to say out loud and in public there are differences between men and women, the world has gone mad.

When we’re not allowed to acknowledge that rioting is rioting and it is bad and that silence is not violence, but violence is violence, the world has gone mad,” Weiss said.

When you’re not able to say the Hunter Biden laptop is a story worth pursuing, the world has gone mad.

When, in the name of progress, young school children, as young as kindergarten, are being separated in public schools because of their race, and that is called progress instead of segregation, the world has gone mad. There are dozens of examples.”

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Poster Boy, by James Howard Kunstler

What is the point of the Democrats’ drive to destroy the country? The destruction is the point, and there is no other. From James Howard Kunstler at kunstler.com:

Maybe Dr. Sanjay Gupta was born at night — but surely not last night. Apparently, CNN’s house doctor went into his interview on the Joe Rogan Experience with eyes wide shut. Did his handlers and preppers not have a clue that Joe would give Sanjay the business about CNN’s deliberate, incessant, and epic lying in the service of forces that seek to destroy the country, its people, and western civ with them?

The issue was Mr. Rogan declaring publicly that he took ivermectin with a suite of other drugs to get over Covid-19 in a few days’ time and then CNN’s defaming of the Nobel Prize winning drug as “horse de-wormer,” and defaming Joe Rogan for taking it. CNN’s bad faith propaganda plays a key role in the dishonest and untrustworthy campaign by America’s public health officialdom, led by Dr. Anthony Fauci, to prevent the clinically-proven ivermectin early treatment protocol from being recognized by the FDA, because doing so would nullify the FDA’s emergency use authorization for the still-unapproved Covid-19 “vaccines.”

It was painful to watch Sanjay wriggle and try to squirm away from the accusation that his network lies knowingly to the public (and that he abets it). “It’s a lie that they’re conscious of, it’s not a mistake,” Joe Rogan said, pithing the famous TV doc like a common carpet moth. “You know that they know they’re lying,” he pressed on. “Do you think that’s a problem, that your news network lies?”

Yeah, it’s a problem, Sanjay finally admitted, lamely. And it’s no small problem that the nation’s community of doctors has allowed itself to be buffaloed into killing tens-of-thousands of patients across the land who are denied life-saving treatments, while harming and killing many others with “vaccines” which deliver toxic spike proteins that damage blood vessels and organs.

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After Resigning For Sexual Harassment, Cuomo Immediately Hired By CNN

From The Babylon Bee:

ATLANTA, GA—Former Governor Andrew Cuomo has resigned in disgrace amid accusations of sexual harassment, but the sky is still the limit for his career, as CNN immediately hired him under a multi-million-dollar contract.

As soon as CNN learned the man was credibly accused of sexual harassment, they scooped him up to be an on-air personality.

“Between his ability to lie through his teeth, cover up atrocities, and sexually harass women, we think Mr. Cuomo will be a perfect fit for our company culture here at CNN,” said CNN President Jeff Zucker. “What a find for our cable news channel! Plus, his brother already works here, and the two have intimate knowledge of each other’s scandals. Mr. Cuomo will really hit the ground running here.”

“Welcome, Mr. Cuomo!”

At publishing time, CNN had confirmed the Cuomo brothers will star in a new show called “Super Cuomo Bros.” where they jump on seniors’ heads to murder them and throw fireballs at the elderly.

https://babylonbee.com/news/after-resigning-for-sexual-harassment-cuomo-immediately-hired-by-cnn

CNN Hires Trump As News Anchor To Recover Lost Viewers

From The Babylon Bee:

CNN’s New “Reporter,” Natasha Bertrand, is a Deranged Conspiracy Theorist and Scandal-Plagued CIA Propagandist, by Glenn Greenwald

Of course, you could say the above about most CNN reporters. A tried and true means of journalistic career advancement is to get in bed with the CIA. From Glenn Greenwald at greenwald.substack.com:

In the U.S. corporate media, the surest way to advance is to loyally spread lies and deceit from the U.S. security state. Bertrand is just the latest example.

CNN’s new national security reporter Natasha Bertrand, then of Politico and NBC News, with MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, Sept. 19, 2019

The most important axiom for understanding how the U.S. corporate media functions is that there is never accountability for those who serve as propagandists for the U.S. security state. The opposite is true: the more aggressively and recklessly you spread CIA narratives or pro-war manipulation, the more rewarded you will be in that world.

The classic case is Jeffrey Goldberg, who wrote one of the most deceitful and destructive articles of his generation: a lengthy New Yorker article in May, 2002 — right as the propagandistic groundwork for the invasion of Iraq was being laid — that claimed Saddam Hussein had formed an alliance with Al Qaeda and Osama bin Laden. In February, 2003, on the eve of the invasion of Iraq, NPR host Robert Siegel devoted a long segment to this claim. When he asked Goldberg about “a man named Abu Musab al-Zarqawi,” Goldberg replied: “He is one of several men who might personify a link between Iraq and al-Qaeda.”

Needless to say, nothing could generate hatred for someone among the American population — just nine months away from the 9/11 attack — more than associating them with bin Laden. Five months after Goldberg’s New Yorker article, the U.S. Congress authorized the use of military force to impose regime change on Iraq; ten months later, the U.S. invaded Iraq; and by September, 2003, close to 70% of Americans believed the lie that Saddam had personally participated in the 9/11 attack.

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Twitter Permanently Bans Project Veritas Founder O’Keefe, by Bowen Xiao

Big tech and mainstream media are one big club, and they work with and protect each other. From Bowen Xiao at theepochtimes.com:

The Twitter account of James O’Keefe, the founder of Project Veritas, was permanently suspended on April 15 following a series of recordings the undercover journalism nonprofit posted as part of an expose on CNN.

A Twitter spokesperson didn’t immediately respond to a request for comment. However, other reporters said the social media platform told them that O’Keefe had been banned “for violating the Twitter Rules on platform manipulation and spam.”

Twitter pointed to a section in the company’s rules, which states: “You can’t mislead others on Twitter by operating fake accounts,” and “you can’t artificially amplify or disrupt conversations through the use of multiple accounts.”

At the time of the suspension, O’Keefe had over 900,000 followers. A link to his profile now shows a screen that states “account suspended.”

O’Keefe told The Epoch Times he had heard something about a Twitter source reportedly saying the ban was due to “running a network of accounts that claimed to be things they weren’t.” He said the social media company would be emailing him momentarily with a formal reason.

O’Keefe later posted a screenshot on Telegram of the email Twitter sent to him regarding his account. That email said he was “permanently suspended” specifically for “fake accounts” used to “manipulate Twitter conversations.”

“I don’t know what they think, that I’m a Russian bot?” O’Keefe said in a phone call. “I don’t know what they are talking about. We just did the CNN thing for three days—I guess we are too effective.

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“Where The Hell Are We?” – Biden’s CNN Townhall Disaster Ignored By Mainstream Media, by Tyler Durden

Joe Biden is not all there, and hasn’t been for a long time. From Tyler Durden at zerohedge.com:

In his first such public appearance since the campaign, President Biden joined CNN’s Anderson Cooper on stage last night in Milwaukee in a town-hall-style discussion. It did not go well… but you’d never know that if you only read the mainstream media.

The president faced no pushback from Mr.Cooper for failing to denounce China’s Uyghur genocide calling it a “cultural norm”, or claims that black or brown ‘folks’ don’t know how to use the internet, that military is fueling the “growth of white supremacy, or the fact that he wakes up every morning wondering “where the hell are we?”

As Summit News’  Steve Watson details below, the question, after watching this, should be “this guy is in charge now?”

When Anderson Cooper asked the hard hitting probing question ‘What is it like to live in the White House?’ Biden responded by stating “I wake up every morning, look at Jill, and say ‘where the hell are we?’”

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